Street theatre 1

Script 1: the Police Officer and the Surgeon

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Officer

’Allo’, ’allo, ’allo. What’s goin’ on ’ere then?

Surgeon

It’s a surgical strike!

Officer

A strike! ’Ave you got an official ballot for that?

Surgeon

Oh, no! The bankers and private health companies can strike our hospital down without one,

Officer

’Ow can they do that?

Surgeon

They told us the hospital was bombing.

Officer

You can’t go about bombing. They ’ave to stop that!

Surgeon

But we weren’t. The service was bombing because they starved us of the money, so we couldn’t give the care. They set us up to fail. Now they are striking at the heart of the hospital.

Officer

I  told you about strikes.

Surgeon

They’re taking out the labs this Christmas. Next they’re taking out the mortuary. Then they’ll take out the A&E. They’re bombing us back to a cottage hospital.

Officer

A cottage hospital? That’s going a bit far!

Surgeon

Not as far as the public will have to go for treatment.

 

SONG

(to the tune of 'It's a long way to Tipparary')

 

It’s a long way to go to Norwich;

Even longer there and back.

But that’s how far you have to travel

If you have a heart attack.

There’s a hospital around the corner,

But you’ll find they’ve closed the door;

So it’s forty miles to any treatmentIf you don’t die before.

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